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Hello, from the mountains of Colorado. It has been almost five months since I transported myself from island to mountains. The experience of transition never fails to be less than exciting. There was so much in my heart being stirred that it has been impossible to understand it all. I am beginning to embrace the reality of the chaos that transition brings internally. It is a process of giving up the old and embracing the new. This sounds simple. Yet the path of the simple act of giving up and embracing new has been more than challenging for me. I never really realized how tight I was holding on things until I was trying to let go. The grip was shocking to me as I began the process of giving up my time in Maui. Maui was more than a home for me. It represented family, growth, and a place where I was understood, encouraged, and loved. I came to Maui as a young 21 year old and was took into a culture that I could be myself. It started out with YWAM, then New Hope Maui, and then just the beauty of island life and relationships. I think I really believed there was no place on earth other than Maui that I would feel safe, loved, content, and free. I lived in Minneapolis the last 2 years, but frequently went back to Maui every few months. My deep connections were still with people there and my church that I longed to be with. I got the best of both worlds for a couple years as I continued life on the mainland and had Maui every few months. I never had to let go, I could have both. Why, because Minneapolis was always temporary for me. It was a season I was there. I loved what I did, loved the people I was with, but my heart was in Maui and my family there. It worked in my heart for two years.

I don't know how to describe the difference of my moving to Colorado. I realize that I move and transition quite a bit. I do thrive on change and embrace it easy. I love the newness of a place, and newness of a job, and beginnings. But there is a deep seed of independence that has fear of being stuck, being misunderstood, and being left. Most people don't see that side of me because it rarely shows it's ugly face. I don't want to be trapped. I like the wind of change and the sensation of newness. There has been nothing that has been appealing to staying and creating a sense of roots. Until now.

Here I am in Colorado with some amazing people that captured my heart. It is not in the state or my job, it is the people that I am with here. That has made everything different for me. For the first time in life, I am ready to settle down and be here. That is a big step for me and affects my life and the choices surrounding me. I will always travel. I will always be ME. But now home is not a place, it is the people.